Jabberwocky

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe; All mimsy were the borogoves, And the mome raths outgrabe. "Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun The frumious Bandersnatch!" He took his vorpal sword in hand; Long time the manxome foe he sought— So rested he by the Tumtum tree, And stood awhile in thought. And, as in uffish thought he stood, The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame, Came whiffling through the tulgey wood, And burbled as it came! One, two! One, two! And through and through The vorpal blade went snicker-snack! He left it dead, and with its head He went galumphing back. "And hast thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!" He chortled in his joy. 'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe; All mimsy were the borogoves, And the mome raths outgrabe.

Lewis Carroll, from Through the Looking-Glass, 1871.

pairs with: strong black tea and something you can't quite identify, gingerbread perhaps, eaten slightly too fast.

The Owl and the Pussy-Cat

The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea In a beautiful pea-green boat, They took some honey, and plenty of money, Wrapped up in a five-pound note. The Owl looked up to the stars above, And sang to a small guitar, "O lovely Pussy! O Pussy, my love, What a beautiful Pussy you are, You are, You are! What a beautiful Pussy you are!" Pussy said to the Owl, "You elegant fowl! How charmingly sweet you sing! O let us be married! too long we have tarried: But what shall we do for a ring?" They sailed away, for a year and a day, To the land where the Bong-tree grows And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood With a ring at the end of his nose, His nose, His nose, With a ring at the end of his nose. "Dear Pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling Your ring?" Said the Piggy, "I will." So they took it away, and were married next day By the Turkey who lives on the hill. They dined on mince, and slices of quince, Which they ate with a runcible spoon; And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand, They danced by the light of the moon, The moon, The moon, They danced by the light of the moon.

Edward Lear, 1871.

pairs with: honey tea and a slice of quince tart, eaten with a spoon that is, ideally, a bit runcible.

"There was an Old Man with a Beard"

There was an Old Man with a beard, Who said, "It is just as I feared! Two Owls and a Hen, Four Larks and a Wren, Have all built their nests in my beard!"

Edward Lear, from A Book of Nonsense, 1846.

pairs with: a nest-shaped scone and a strong cup of Assam, served in a wide, beard-friendly mug.

The Walrus and the Carpenter

Full text not included here — paste a verified copy from Poetry Foundation or Project Gutenberg.

Lewis Carroll, from Through the Looking-Glass, 1871.

pairs with: oyster crackers and a briny green tea, or, if you're feeling wicked about it, a proper pint of stout.

Résumé

Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful; You might as well live.

Dorothy Parker, from Enough Rope, 1926.

pairs with: a very dry martini. if tea only, black, unsweetened, no nonsense.

One Perfect Rose

A single flow'r he sent me, since we met. All tenderly his messenger he chose; Deep-hearted, pure, with scented dew still wet— One perfect rose. I knew the language of the floweret; "My fragile leaves," it said, "his heart enclose." Love long has taken for his amulet One perfect rose. Why is it no one ever sent me yet One perfect limousine, do you suppose? Ah no, it's always just my luck to get One perfect rose.

Dorothy Parker, from Enough Rope, 1923.

pairs with: rose petal tea and a single, perfect madeleine. no more, no less.

On the Birth of His Son

Families, when a child is born, want it to be intelligent. I, through intelligence, having wrecked my whole life, only hope the baby will prove ignorant and stupid. Then he will crown a peaceful life by becoming a Cabinet Minister.

Su Shi (Su Dongpo), Song Dynasty, 11th century. Translated by Arthur Waley, from A Hundred and Seventy Chinese Poems, 1918.

pairs with: oolong tea and a modest bowl of congee, befitting a father's humbled hopes.

Bring in the Wine (將進酒)

See how the Yellow River's water move out of heaven. Entering the ocean,never to return. See how lovely locks in bright mirrors in high chambers, Though silken-black at morning, have changed by night to snow. ... Oh, let a man of spirit venture where he pleases And never tip his golden cup empty toward the moon! Since heaven gave the talent, let it be employed! Spin a thousand of pieces of silver, all of them come back! Cook a sheep, kill a cow, whet the appetite, And make me, of three hundred bowls, one long drink! ... To the old master, Tsen, And the young scholar, Tan-chiu, Bring in the wine! Let your cups never rest! Let me sing you a song! Let your ears attend! What are bell and drum, rare dishes and treasure? Let me br forever drunk and never come to reason! Sober men of olden days and sages are forgotten, And only the great drinkers are famous for all time. ... Prince Chen paid at a banquet in the Palace of Perfection Ten thousand coins for a cask of wine, with many a laugh and quip. Why say, my host, that your money is gone? Go and buy wine and we'll drink it together! My flower-dappled horse, My furs worth a thousand, Hand them to the boy to exchange for good wine, And we'll drown away the woes of ten thousand generation!.

Li Bai (Li Po), Tang Dynasty, 8th century. Translator to be credited.

pairs with: warm rice wine, or a rich red. not tea at all — Li Bai would insist.

The Rose Garland (Das Rosenband)

I found her in the spring shade, And bound her fast with a rose garland: Oblivious, she slumbered on. I gazed on her; with that gaze My life became entwined with hers: This I sensed, yet did not know. I murmured wordlessly to her And rustled the garland of roses: Then she woke from slumber. She gazed on me; with that gaze Her life became entwined with mine, And Paradise bloomed about us.

Friedrich Gottlieb Klopstock, written 1753, first published 1762. Often translated as "The Rose Garland," also seen as "The Rose Chain" or "The Rose Ribbon." Later set to music by Schubert (D. 280).

pairs with: rosehip tea and shortbread, taken in dappled shade.